praise you in this storm

Well, it's the Saturday after what was probably the hardest week and a half of my life and I can't help but be grateful for God.

I've been flooded with homework, makeup work , teachers who lack communication skills, and quizzes I didn't know about. Then I was struck down with a sore throat, stuffy nose and a fever which caused me to spend literally my entire day in bed yesterday and my homework and makeup work to seem insurmountable.

Not only did I have all that to deal with this week but I was still facing the shock of Grandaddy passing away.

At first I was in pure shock because it had happened SO suddenly. I had heard people speak of loss and had experienced distant loss a few times myself but no one as close or as precious as my own Grandfather. I felt like there were so many things I could've done to let him know I loved him and so many opportunities to hang out with him that I didn't take but I know there's no point in regrets.

Now, nearly two weeks later, I think what stands out most is the overwhelming peace I've experienced. 

I can't even fathom how upset I would be without the complete confidence I have in the fact that Grandaddy went to heaven. He was a strong christian man who lived out Christ in every aspect of his life. When he left this earth there was no doubt in anyone's mind about where he was headed. God took Grandaddy up on an early flight to heaven's pearly gates.

I have also had peace through this entire situation that God is in control and that he has everything planned out. Our arrival, our departure, everything. It may not match my plan or Granny's plan or anyone's plan for that matter because no one wanted Grandaddy to leave this soon, but GOD had it planned.

God knew we could handle it. He was there to comfort us with his unfailing love, to hold us up, to hug us and to give us the memories that carry us through.

I honestly think that this whole situation brought my family a lot closer. I feel closer to my parents, brother and sisters. I feel closer to my Dad who needed my support this time when it is usually the other way around. I feel closer to Mark and everyone else who wasn't afraid to show their emotions. I feel like my parents are a stronger pair then ever and I got to see how much they really need each other. I feel closer to my brother-in-law John who was a true family member and a father of Grandaddy's great grandson when it happened. I feel closer to my extended family because we all went through it together. I feel closer to Granny because I know she needs love now more than ever.

God works in mysterious ways, but IT WORKS.

Today I figured out that a friend I had met while in San Diego this past summer experienced the loss of her Brother and Sister-in-law today. They were tragically killed in an apartment fire and neither one of them made it out in time. I also figured out that my roommate's Mom who has been sick for a while is in the hopstial and they don't know if she'll make it.

I know that both of these families are experiencing a lot of sadness and hurt right now but I know God is in control. We can't figure out how his "mind" works and I'm not going to try.

I'm confident in his choices and even if I wasn't, they'd be made anyway. I'm praying for these families and that they'll draw closer to God through all of it.

I feel like life is an ocean and sadness comes in waves. I feel like that's were satan can come in and try and pull us under but if we hold on to God he will shelter us from the treacherous waters.

I know that I've become stronger through my sadness and I hope that my friends can say the same. 

"And I'll praise you in this storm 
and I will lift my hands 
for You are who You are 
no matter where I am 
and every tear I've cried 
You hold in your hand 
You never left my side 
and though my heart is torn 
I will praise You in this storm"