May 31, 2011

another galaxy

It never hit me 
what I'd miss
riding in the light of night
barefooted soles touch
grass, a woven basket of darkened green.

You were a winner, (though humble)
 a bee without a sting.
You called me kid
but it never did sound the same
when the wind whispered it.

Laying under the handlebar moon,
 I grasp the edge and slide it toward me
trying to find you in the sky
a bicycle of stars
 I begin pedaling toward a further nowhere.

It never hit me
until you were gone that
 the push I shoved to throw your love away
was a push that somehow
pulled me under.

I gasp for air, lean my head back, 
my hair spreads with fluidity in the dark
brimming backward towards never again
as words unsaid spill over and I'm left mumbling
a hum in unison with the cicadas of summer.

I grab the moon
slam down the stars

and pedal faster.

May 30, 2011


Yeah, an American Soldier, an American.
Beside my Brothers and my Sisters I will proudly take a stand,
When liberty's in jeopardy I'll always do what's right,
I'm out here on the front lines, so sleep in peace tonight.

American Soldier, 
I'm an American,
American Soldier.

May 26, 2011

not so pleasant reading...

While I'm at ECU I'm taking two classes, three is the maximum and I wanted to take more than one so I had to find two that would transfer over from ECU to APP. Since I'm a creative writing minor, I figured I'd just try and take two english classes while here.

One of my classes is Major British Writers (bore me to death) and the other one is Interpreting Literature. When we first registered for classes I was in the Interpreting Literature class without Lindy but after some convincing and schedule rearranging, she ended up switching into it with me.

After the third day of it, I felt pretty bad for making her sign up for it.

In the class we are reading a variety of books but the first one we were assigned is called Brief Interviews with Hideous Men and it's a compilation of short stories by one author.

(by the way the author committed suicide, this post doesn't make that too surprising)

We were told to pick 5 stories we were  interested in reading as a class from the book and we were to read those over night for our homework assignment.

We'll the "Hideous" in the title ended up being a gross understatement. This book was DISGUSTING.

Never in my life have I felt more grossed out by a piece of writing. One of the short stories we were assigned to read was about a Dad that sexually exposes himself to his child and denies it, one was about a Mom that loathes herself and her kid, one was about a 13 year old boy going through puberty and there were other lovely stories. But the worst was one called Adult World. Take a guess at what is was about...

Well, let me just tell you, it was about a young wife going to a sex store called Adult World because she felt inadequate to her husband. Yep, we had to read that. Every other word was grind or sex or any other disgusting word you can imagine. Seriously like X-rated, pornography material. I felt nauseous after I read it. I couldn't even finish it.

And not only did we read it, he also made us discuss it as a class.

He said that we all have had a sexual experience like the one in the story.
Um, False.
Like when we saw our parents naked for the first time.
Um, what the heck? That has never happened to me and I'm crossing my fingers it never will.

I was appalled. APPALLED. And so fired up about it!!
Luckily every other person in the class was too, and that is saying something! Even the guys thought it was disgusting and weird and way too graphic.

He asked us what we thought was wrong with it and I (as most people know I am not afraid to speak my mind) told him that I didn't think reading this was fair.

If I was a teacher and assigned a book that was about Christianity and Jesus and the things that I value there would be a huge uproar about it!

Separation of church and state,
forcing ideas on people,
everyone should have their own opinion
religion shouldn't be involved in school etc etc.
People would be livid that a book like that was assigned.

And yet it is okay to assign a book that is pretty much the script to a disgusting porno because it's "part of our world" and "everyone has had an experience where they've had to embrace sexuality".

This is the kind of thing that
a. makes me want to go to a Christian college so I don't have to read trash like this
b. makes me sad for our world.

Is this really the stuff that people fill their minds with? Really? That is just awful.

Luckily we're done with the book now but I'm still appalled by it. I'm going to pray for the mind of my teacher who believes the stuff in this book is normal and pray for anyone who has to read it. I'm also gonna pray for colleges who are so wrapped up in this worldliness.

Anyway, I just thought I'd share.

But if this ever happens to you, just stand up for it, because if we're reading this now who knows what our kids will be reading years down the road.

if you haven't noticed...

I'm extremely indecisive about what I want my blog layout to be.


So I'm doing simple colors and that's it.


...for now.

May 25, 2011

tomorrow starts here.


sleepovers with Lindy
french toast & smoothies
lots and lots of Starbucks

Sonic runs
barnes and noble study time
laying out
grocery shopping
sharing clothes
sitting poolside
college classes together
BBQ for dinner

reading boring british writers
windows down in the car
cuter boys in 2 days at ECU then 2 years at APP
trip to the dog park
creaky lofted bed
twin time
Cubbie's burgers

heat from the hot hot sun
learning my way around
mexican train dominos
jumping in the pull - no pushing

singing in the car
church on sunday
homework that we don't want to do
crackling tv shows
lots of diversity
walking around campus
fun times to go around!

(I'll try to take some of my own pictures soon!)

May 23, 2011

May 21, 2011

just sayin...

I'm really glad the world didn't end tonight cause I'd like to experience at least one relationship before I leave this place!

May 20, 2011

friendship communication rant.

I'm just going to go ahead and say it...

What is it with people and communication these days? Does it kill people to stay in touch?
I'm not going to lie or be a pot calling the kettle black because I know I'm not a pro at it either but I feel like so many people lack communication skills.

Yeah, high school relationships have faded. Yeah, a lot of my friends have lost touch with me and vice versa and yeah, a lot of my friendships have ended because growing lack of similarities. But I have friends that I love a lot and yet I still am not even hearing from them now that I'm home for summer.

It could be because of our obsessive use of technology (as I'm obviously using now). We rely on twitter, facebook and texts now instead of talking on the phone. When were not together we just read what our friends are saying on a screen instead of hearing their voice. Since this happens so much, when we're apart we don't realize what we're missing because their voice was never there in the first place unless we were physically together.

But what makes me so frustrated is when I text people and "tweet" them and write on their wall and do all of these other technologically advanced forms of communication and they still don't respond.

Now come on. I sent you a text message and it takes maybe 45 seconds at the most to respond. I understand you might be busy or away from your phone when I send it but you should at least respond later that night or the next day or something!

I've been at home for about 3 weeks now and I've had only like 2 friends ask me about my summer. I've tried to text my other friends and talk to them about theirs but they don't answer me.

I may be being too sensitive but when someone doesn't respond to me it makes me feel like I've been forgotten or replaced or that I value the friendship way more then they value mine. Here I am wondering how so-and-so's summer is going and they can't even bother to respond to me.

There are a few select friends that I've known for years  and that I'm so close to that even if we don't talk 24-7, we still are as close as before. But most of my friendships require some back and forth communication.

I'm one of those people who puts a lot of effort and value into my friendships and I don't have that many of them because I put time and effort into each one. I love buying birthday gifts, having them over, and doing pointless things to make them feel like I care and I don't mind spending money on my friends. I put a lot of time into getting to know someone and showing them that I value their friendship.

Trust me, if I love hanging out with you and having you as a friend, you'll know it. I just wish that people would take into consideration the fact that I'm trying to communicate and if I'm thinking about them enough to initiate conversation or whatever it is, then they should care enough to respond.

Maybe I'm just exaggerating in my head the amount of communication I've actually tried to initiate but who knows..

Okay the end, sorry for 

May 17, 2011

one word prompt - forgotten

I didn’t think I’d be forgotten, at least not by you. We had made a lasting impression on the oak by Lace river and I’d trample on the fallen leaves in my leather boots, the ones my mom passed down. The top folded over like the hide of a wrinkly cow to reveal initials that I'd stitched in with navy thread. You liked the way they made my knees look knobby and I liked the way you stared.

We hadn't known each other long but what I did know is the scar on your arm had been there since you were three and you cried for hours when your dog Buster died.

My Daddy warned me about boys like you. He said they're too reckless and they'd only breed trouble. I was too stupid to listen and would kick up dust on our barn floor, eyes on my boots and the dirt that would sparkle in the sunshine, dreaming of the next time I'd see you. 

I didn't think that after those long autumn months, you're face was all I'd see for the rest of my life.

May 14, 2011

May 11, 2011

summertime and the livin is easy...

Well it's finally summer! Goodbye classes, helloooo vacation! (for now)

I've been home for a week now and it has been amazing. Last week I was the only one home until friday so I just did whatever I wanted. I bought a new book, got coffee, went to the mall, hung out with Ashley & David, played the kinect and did lots of relaxing.

haha this frog is straight up relaxed.

I love the feeling when you come home. It's such a relief to come home for summer and not have a single assignment or test hanging over my head. I had been working so hard the last few weeks! This semester was a lot of work but it paid off and I made Dean's list for a second semester in a row! So I'm pretty proud of myself haha!

Summer also means I get to start my internship for Charlotte Style Magazine and yesterday was my first day! I headed over to Bridgette's house (the editor) and we got to know each other and I was able to watch as she was featured in a photo shoot for Crave charlotte edition. Crave is a REALLY cool book! Its " The most unique and stylish guidebook for city living and the ultimate guide to the places women CRAVE." It features sucessful women in big cities! They have one for cities such as Atlanta, L.A., Boston, NYC and now Charlotte! You can check out their website here CRAVE

Bridgette also gave me the opportunity to help design a page layout for the featured designers page in their magazine. I LOVE layout design and had so much fun getting doing that last night! We used InDesign for Lit Mag in high school and I was happy to get back into the swing of it.

The photo shoot and page design were both really fun and I am so pumped for the rest of the internship!

The photo shoot was at 11:30 about 45 minutes away near Lake Wylie so by the time I was headed home it was 1:30. Aka the perfect time to pick up some Sonic. (too bad I missed happy hour) But let me just say, sonic is probably one of the most delicious fast food places EVER. Sonic cheeseburger, fries and a strawberry limeade? Umm, yes please! It was phenomenal. 

Then this morning Lindy and I went to Starbucks to hang out and get some yummy coffee! And she took some pretty swell photos of me for her blog! 

Today is also Ashley's birthday! After Lindy and I got Starbucks we picked up her present and brought her a red velvet cupcake from SAS! Ashley is turning 24 today! I cannot even tell you how much I love having her as my big sister! She is so sweet, an amazing role model, and an awesome new mom! She is so fun to shop with, go on trips with, jam out in the car with and talk to on the phone! I am lucky to have been her little sister for the past 20 years and many more years to come!

Anyway, long story short, my summer is going swell. I am really looking forward to starting classes at ECU and all the fun stuff that summer has to bring!