August 31, 2010

another depressing poem by Laura


She had never known isolation
until it came tumbling 
out of the sky, a falling bird,
into her lap.

Time was irrelevant,
yet all that mattered.
A note of music;
a melody to drown in.

Her fragile heart 
now beats feather soft against her ribs
after mere minutes of neglect.

She'd walked into submission.
Her own thoughts wound a maze
around her head and 
coerced her into her own prison.

She dangled the key in front of her mind's eye.
A pendulum of freedom 
monotonously swinging back and forth 
like the rhythmic tic of a metronome. 

Thump, thump
thump, thump.

flutters sporadically;
feathers upon her soul.

August 29, 2010

laughter is the best medicine

I think laughter is one of the greatest things that God has ever created. Laughing can cure any mood. You suddenly forget how upset, angry, or hurt you are and laugh until you cry...

Laughing so hard that it's silent and your shoulders just shake up and down
When something makes a weird ketchup
pushing someone into a pool
babies cute.
watching reality shows.
"this is for all my friends on my Stickam friend's list..."
Trying to catch something in your mouth
when other people laugh
Acting ghetto
miserably failing at "jumping pictures"
Overly competitive people
how when you have money for shopping you can't find anything but when you don't have money, you always do.
"airrrr ballls "
hand gestures
really obnoxious commercial jingles
When people can't dance but they think they can
when your stomach growls at you
Laughing so hard you cry which then makes you laugh more
The Office
" i'm not touching you, i'm not touching you, i'm not touching you..."
the sound macaroni makes when you stir it
Will Ferrell
When the other team misses a goal
Funny accents
Bugging someone
spelling something wrong on accident and realizing it spelled a funny word
when someone comes up behind you and scares you
you tell someone bye and then end up walking in the same direction
when you're eating and all you can hear is the silveware
old school knock knock jokes
the fact that musicals are about people randomly breaking out in song
acting british
missing a high five
old people and technology
acting like you're 5
trying to skype with no sound
making lame faces
fumbling your words
when my dog, Rocky, runs around the house at 120 miles an hour
Tina Fey
Jokes that are a play on words.. "did you hear about the fire at the circus? was in tents.."
when you stay up way later than you should have and you become delirious
when someone you're with has to pee really bad and you try to make them laugh
Trying to not think of's REALLY HARD!
The movie Mean Girls, I could watch it every day
Quoting stuff. I LOVE to quote.

go find something funny and just LAUGH - it'll make you feel better.

August 24, 2010

19 years old today!!!

First of all I want to say Happy Birthday to the most amazing twin and my best friend in the entire world, Lindy Maddox!!!! It was so hard being away from her today. We have shared 17 birthdays together and this is the 2nd year that we've been apart. I just wanted to give her a big twin birthday hug but I couldn't. We did get to iChat though but it's just not the same! I love her so much, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TWIN!!!

I can't believe I'm about to embark on my last year of being a teenager. This is INSANE.I can't believe I'm this old! I feel like just yesterday I was running around in overalls, coloring in coloring books, playing with american girl dolls and sharing a bathtub with Lindy.

And now look at us! We're starting our sophomore year of COLLEGE?

we went from being 4 pounds ( this is Lindy)

To little chubs

Yes, we are identical

Aw! Showin' mark some love.
Blowing Bubbles.

This picture makes me smile.
Mirror Twins!

Us dressed up as the characters of Grease. I'm the "Bad Sandy"..DUHHHHHH!
( if we had only known how perverted grease really was haha)
Jammin out. Always loved dancing.

American girls with american girls.

Senior Prom

Graduating, oh how the time flew by.

Still Matching. 

So gangsta. So thug.
We didn't even plan to jump the same way! WIEIEIERD.


I miss her more than I could have ever imagined, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!

August 20, 2010

To Conquer

She bows her head and sighs
a mere speck in the enormity of her surroundings.

Her thoughts wander and 
she gets lost in the steady ebb and flow of reality.

Life is never what it seems; it's a challenge.
It stands in front of you; harsh boulders and rocky edges wait to be conquered.

And once you've ascended the cliff
and find yourself ragged and rough from the journey, the only way down is to repel.

A content breath falls from her lips and does nothing to the wind 
but disperse and unravel it's self upon the mountainy expanse that stretches out before her.

Beauty in it's rawest form;
both the mountains and the journey.

And as serenity falls over her like a fresh morning rain, 
and the troubles of her life fall away

the only thing left to do is thank the Maker
for the beauty he created 

and the journey she has traveled
if only 
for him.

August 15, 2010

I've fallen for FALL

Winter is too cold.
Spring gives me allergies.
Summer is too hot.
but Fall,
Fall is juuuuuust right.

These past few months in Charlotte have been so hot and humid! Right when you walk outside your hair frizzes, the leather steering wheel in your car is too hot to touch, you begin to sweat profusely, the air feels to thick to swallow and there are mosquitos everywhere.

Um, no thank you! I prefer autumn air for sure!

Nothing compares to the crisp refreshing mountain air and autumn in the Mountains is pure happiness!

So I decided to list some reasons why I LOVE FALL and why everyone should too!

1. Sweatshirts -
A comfy-cozy-soft-plushy-long sleeve-ball of warmth...who wouldn't want to wear one?

2. Coffee
There is nothing like waking up in the morning to the autumn air and grabbing yourself a cup of coffee on your way to class. It warms you up in no time and as the fall leaves crinkle under your feet and the crisp cinnamony air blows through your hair, you are reassured that yes, fall is finally here.

3. Football.
Big screens,  Chili, instant replays, cornbread, the thrill of the game, sweatshirts, team spirit, tailgating, BBQ, yelling, rivals, hot chocolate, family time...all the things that make football so much fun!

4. Fall clothes
It's time to break out the boots, ladies and gentlemen! The time has finally arrived for you to pull that dusty bin out of the back of your closet full of cute jackets! And you can finally put on the best outfit ever - jeans and a t-shirt without being a little toasty!Fall clothes = love.

5. Thanksgiving
Thanksgiving is my second favorite holiday after Christmas. I love watchiing the Macy's thanksgiving day parade on TV with the family and having everyone over to hang out. I love the concept of giving thanks, and creating a day just for that. I love the honey baked ham, turkey, gravy, stuffing, copper pennies, spinach dip and the assortment of casseroles. LOVE.

6. Leaves!!!
Fiery Reds, golds, deep browns, oranges and crimsons. I love when they blow in the wind and cover the sidewalk. I love how they look up against a bright blue sky. I love jumping in them and kicking them around. I love picking up the prettiest ones I can find. I love thinking about how cool it is that God made colors that are so pretty.

7. New Beginnings
I love the fact that fall gives you a new start. You finished summer and now you have the whole year ahead of you! You have the chance to start fresh! And now you can buy yourself that really fun annual purchase - a new planner! (Oh, the simple things in life)

8. Smiles
I feel like moods improve in the Fall. With all the fun things going on, how can you not have fun?

So lets sit back and push our way through these last few weeks of summer and gear up for all the wonderful things Autumn has to offer, it'll be here before you know it!


August 10, 2010

over, over. 10-4.

Do you ever feel like you can't hear God? 

It's like I have a two way walkie-talkie and all his can do is listen to whatever I'm saying. I consistently pray and expect some kind of verbal holy answer to come blasting out of the sky but nothing happens. I end up trying to make a decision that I think god wanted for me, but I'm never completely sure of.

I just want to scream. " Come on, God. I need some feed back here! "

I frequently find myself doing really idiotic things when I can't hear God.

I remember the night I was trying to decide between UNCW and APP I kept saying "Ok If I'm supposed to go to APP, make something make a loud noise in the house.." 

First I heard something kind of quiet and I didn't know if it counted so i said 

"God, if I'm meant to go to APP make something make a REALLY loud noise!"

And low and behold our dyer jumped or something so here I am, an APP student.

Maybe I just don't know what to listen for, or maybe I'm just weird, but sometimes I feel like I'm making up God's voice in my head...

I've always had a vivid imagination and I feel like when I pray it tends to wander all over the place. I've realized that sometimes when I pray and I really want an answer, I hear this weird version of a voice in my head booming over my mind. It's almost like Morgan Freeman or something but I can tell it's still me. Like a strange version of prayer schizophrenia where I've just created this imaginary voice that tells me whatever I feel like God should be answering.

Slightly pathetic.

Have I been slightly misunderstanding what "hear" actually means. Maybe I'm listening for something that's actually not there at all. Maybe what people mean by "hear" God, is to just get a reassured feeling on your decision.

I read an acronym the other day that really stuck with me -
it's P.U.S.H.


So that's what I'm going to keep doing...even though I have NO idea when something will actually happen!

All I do know is that I need to get this communication thing under control because I'm tired of a faulty walkie-talkie...

roger that?

August 06, 2010

poetry throw back.

( SIDE NOTE - I know ya'll probably get tired of the poetry that I put on here -
Some people really like poetry and some people hate it! But I happen to LOVE IT! So read if you want!)

Ever since I learned how to write poetry I've enjoyed it. Throughout middle school I would even attempt to write songs (which failed miserably) but poetry has always been something I loved to do! In 8th grade I was so proud of myself because I won my english class's poetry competition and then I continued doing it in my free time and eventually joined Lit Mag! So I went through some of my old poems and wanted to put a few on here! 

But I wrote a new one first.

Like always, wanting a boyfriend consumes a lot of my thoughts, although I know it shouldn't, but this is a poem I wrote regarding that time consuming subject of mine.


My stomach
when I think of you.

Yet you, I don't know.

Created for me.
Curiosity can't compare
to the reality unseen.

I persist
eagerly perched on the edge of life.
Waiting to swing my legs over the side
and plummet

into vulnerability.

But crash, I wouldn't -

And oh, you better.

Standards sky high,
but I'm sure you'll reach them.


Patience dwindles.
Because I search
with no results.

I know you're there.
An uncharted territory
my future will further discover.

I wait.
and weight.
Weighs on me.

I'll be waiting,


First off, let us pause and reflect back on the emo days of Laura Maddox...

( yes, I was a punk rock fairy for halloween,rocked Vans, listened to Blink 182, wore way to much black eyeliner and went to the Arvil Lavigne concert for my 14th birthday.)


Ok, continue!

Alright, I know this next poem is really depressing...but it's one of my favorites that I've written.  I wrote it a few years ago and I ended up winning a Scholastic Gold Key Award for it! Even the title sounds bad! Haha, that's me for ya!

Suffocating Despair
The darkness thunders
 through the winter,
bringing her the withered-up truth.
Her lover’s forbidden desires have been revealed;
destructive, deceptive, defeat.
Feelings of anguish cast shadows of gray under her somber eyes.
Once in love,
 She is now fragile, lost.
Will he ever return to her depth
or will she drown in the suffocating despair that swallows her whole?
The bare trees overlook her crumpled frame, 
huddled on the ground;
 lost and broken. 
She is too delicate to stand,
her eyes are fixed yet vacantly staring.
Clouds of his secrecy are thick in her mind.
Consuming her every thought,
His memories strangle her heart with a metal grasp,
While a mirror image of ambers, and crimson hues are cast in her eyes.
A candle sits in her path, 
waiting for an answer.
Will the ember be rekindled
or will her hope unravel with the flame?
The thick fog hangs over her,
 like a billowing cloak.
The haze does nothing but hide her in the inky twilight.
As the wind whispers goodbye her breath is faint in the frigid air.
With one final gasp she stops,
 and the flame reignites,
in remembrance of his affair that shriveled her soul.
And she falls eternally into the darkness.

This next one is about the journey you take when you write something. I love the metaphor of it. And I love writing. LOVE. 

Miles away
It starts out small.
A mark on a page,
a speck on a slate of stark white.
It develops,
words sprawling into an arid desert,
a grain of sand that swirls in a storm of thought. 
Rough, jagged, raw.
Expanding in detail,
the barren becomes fresh, clean, awakened.
The words evolve into green, a newness of life,
a beginning.
Renewal, transformation, revival. 
It continues,
a winding path
branching off in countless directions.
Further and further.
A culmination of modern beliefs,
revision and simplicity.
Writing is in our nature,
writing is escape, writing is restoration.
It starts out small.
But it ends,
miles away. 

This next poem was one that I wrote while I was in a Sophomore creative writing class. They ended up putting it in the Lit Mag that year and that was one of the reasons I joined. I was really proud that I got in!

Judgment day
From time to time
The sun is shining
From time to time
Someone explodes
From time to time
It cost a fortune
From time to time
Our world implodes
From day to day
I’ll take or leave it
From day to day 
We watch the clock
From day to day 
We try to beat it
From day to day
We turn the lock
From stride to stride
We scream and yell out
From stride to stride
We drift and dream
From stride to stride
Our mind will sell out
From stride to stride
We sew the seam
From year to year
Were left unspoken
From life to life
It’s not okay
Right here right now
We fix the broken
For there will be
A judgment day

This poem is about dancing. I've always wanted to be an amazing dancer but I never was haha but this is about a girl who dances purely because of her passion for dance (RENEE THIS REMINDS ME OF YOU!)

Still I point
Sweat Beads Drip.
Drip, Drip.
Threads of silk intertwined with pink lace
A willow confluent in the wind.
Point. Flex, Flex, Flex.
My delicate branches arc.
Abuse the moment.
Point, Extend, Flex.
Apply Pressure.
Muscles contract,
Emotions spur like shooting stars.
Expression going against gravity.
Glide through the air.
Aching limbs
Fight the Pain.
My hearts choreography.
Point Flex.
Polished Steps,
All goes black.
The curtain Closed.
Muscles go limp.
And still I point.
As the sweat drops.

This last one I think I wrote my freshman year. It's kind of funny because I have yet to have a boyfriend yet I write from what seems to be like a married woman's perspective. It's nothing special I just think it's cute! 

He is mine
I see him,
his eyes are shimmering like the moon on a midnight ocean,
and his voice is as smooth as creamy coffee.
I want him,
I want to hold him close to me like a fuzzy blanket
and wrap his soft arms around me for shelter.
I know him,  
the little things that make him matchless
like how he taps his foot while typing and tilts his head when he’s upset.
I trust him,
I trust in how much he cares for me, 
and how he knows what I want even when I am at a loss.
I accept him,
when he is stressed about his job, or ecstatic about life,
he is always there in my embrace.
I love him,
I love his quirky laugh, his serious side, how easily he gets mad,
and how he is always forgiven when he smiles.

I see him, want him, know him, trust him, hold him, love him
and he is mine.

Sorry, I know that was a lot of writing! POETRY = LOVE

August 02, 2010

home is where the heart is.

This weekend I got to move back to one of my favorite places...


I seriously couldn't contain my excitement! When we saw the Appalachian State University sign right before 421 I just started clapping because I was so happy to be back! It's funny how Boone has begun to feel more like home then Charlotte. I guess that's where they get the saying "home is where the heart is" because I definitely left my heart in Boone this summer.

This year I was lucky enough to get a place in the Wilcox Warehouse Apartment complex! It is in the PERFECT SPOT! It's right behind King Street which means its like a 5 minute walk from Black Cat, a custard shop, Mellow Mushroom, Espresso News, Lucky Penny, Macados, Boone Bagelry and a bunch of other fun places!

Since my apartment is a renovated warehouse, it has really tall ceilings with exposed beams and some rooms have cinderblock walls. It feels very "hip" and I love it so much! Unfortunately you can't open the windows though. But I also get my own room and bathroom and have really sweet roommates which makes ALL the difference.

Two of my roommates, Hannah and Lauren, are both going to be Juniors and they play on the field hockey team and Kelly is one of my best friends and we met in my dorm last year.

This year I ended up using the same bedspread and decorations from my dorm last year because it was cheaper! I think it came together well and looks really cute and I'm so excited to live here! I can't believe I have an apartment...I feel SO OLD!

Here are some pictures!

This is my bed and the picture next to it is what I ended up hanging next to the black lamp!
I made the collage thing over my bed using silhouettes and scrapbook paper!

This is my desk with these cute purple flower lights that I bought. You cant see them that well in the picture, but they are made with real flower petals!
This is my dresser area

This is my unfurnished living room!

The exposed ceilings in Kelly's Room

Lindy and Sean near footsloggers!

Lindy stalking me while I order at beanstalk...weirdo. 

Lindy and I at beanstalk!

My friend Amanda started out going to Radford her freshman year but she transfered up to APP now! She is one of my best friends and I love her so so much! I can't wait to get to hang out with her this year! 

Here we are at Capones Pizza! YUM!

I've only been home for like 2 hours and I can't wait to go back! We haven't had the chance to decorate the living room and kitchen yet but once we do I will post pictures! I love my apartment like crazy! It's going to be such a fun year!!!!