April 15, 2010

sitting waiting wishing.

Lets just say that recently I've really struggled with patience when it comes to God. Although I know it's a waste, for some reason I like to imagine that I have control of getting something right when I want it...

I want a job - poof - job.
I want a boyfriend - voila - boyfriend.
I want to have tons of friends - BAM - friends.

FALSE. nope, sorry. WRONG ANSWER.
( obviously, considering I don't have a job, boyfriend or a million friends. )

I tend to find myself consistently baffled by God's timing and end up sounding way too similar to the girl from Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory
"I want it now, I want it right now..."
When in reality, shouldn't I be saying
What does GOD want for me now, RIGHT NOW?

I've begun to realize that one of the main reasons I want so much right now is due to the fact that I'm constantly comparing myself. Everyone else is dating someone, why not me? Everyone else has a job, why can't I find one? Everyone else has something to do this weekend, why don't I?

Hello! The world doesn't revolve around me!
So what I'm not dating right now, it's not the end of the world.
Yeah, a job would be nice so I can earn some money, but why not help out just to help out.
And seriously, take advantage of a free weekend, there are only a few times it's perfectly acceptable to sit around in your pajamas and watch TV all day.

But for some absurd reason when I thought about these things I began to think " something wrong with me?"

Well actually yeah Laura, there is something wrong with you -
You need to stop being SELFISH and start being SELFLESS.

My life isn't about me, it's about GOD. It's not about my timing, it's about HIS.
He has my life in his hands so whatever happens, will happen when HE wants it to
(whether I like it or not)
It's insanely hard to acknowledge, but he really does know what's best for me.

So right now instead of trying to jump onto my ride, which is sure to leave me anxiously waiting by the gate, why not just sit back and enjoy a way more exciting ride - GOD's ride.

After all, what else is there?

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